1. Push To Get Kids of ATVs
I use the same technique to get my dog off the sofa.
2. Happy Hookers Help Homeless
The ‘Happy Hookers’ are actually a crochet group.
3. Trail of Cheetos Leads to Store Robber
No comment
4. Professor Attends Conference
In other shocking news, I can report that I saw a waiter in a restaurant the other day…
5. Farmers Baaa-ffled by Mystery Sheep Branding
Obvious pun perhaps, but still great headline writing.
More Of The Best Funny News Headlines:
- Panasonic: We’ll Save the Earth by Turning CO2 INTO BOOZE
- Cat Beats Stock Brokers in Financial Challenge
- Grandma Killed by ‘Vicious’ Pet Cockatiel
- Engineers Are Cold and Dead Inside Research Shows
- Christian Prophet: “Long-Lasting Shoes Are Proof of Supernatural Miracles from God
- Taiwan Confiscates 435 Dog Penises
- Illegally Logged Trees to Start Calling for Help
- Men Shouldn’t Fear Seductive Snake Women This Year
- Couple Has Been Living Under a Rock, Literally
- Americans, Driven Mad By Politics, Jump Like Lemmings Over the Fiscal Cliff
- Police: Please Stop Throwing Rocks at Buses
- Cross-Dressing Meth Priest Liked Sex in the Rectory
- Sting Operations Reveal Mafia Involvement in Renewable Energy
- Man Tries to Choke Women With Dreadlocks
- U.S. Congress Welcomes First Openly Bipartisan Representative
